Published On: Mon, Mar 25th, 2013

Excuse Me Biological Clock, A Word?

Danielle Mantakoul

Danielle Mantakoul

BA of Ed Early Childhood and Editor at Mummy Weekly
She's described as one of the most engaging & dynamic speakers in the early childhood industry today, now having educated hundreds of thousands of parents & teachers. She has lectured for organisations such as KU Children’s Services, Only About Children, Qantas, National Australia Bank, Child Protection Australia, Goodstart and hundreds of council & private centres. She also developed and ran the popular parenting series for the Australian Financial Review.
Danielle Mantakoul

Excuse Me biological Clock a WordAt 42 years old, I know as much as the next woman that I am reaching my baby expiry date. Now here, I am starting to ask myself. Should I have just one more? With this question of course there is much to be considered, and with three children already, maybe I should be happy with what I have. And so I plead to my sensibilities.

I know I don’t really want another one… do I? I’m sure it’s just my biological clock increasing it’s volume as I hit my early 40’s. Does this clock have any consideration for me at all? I have done my good deed and provided society with three great kids, problem is, someone forgot to tell my biological clock! It’s sounding like one of those annoying battery operated toys deep in the toy box, and every time there is even the slightest of movement, it makes itself known!

I think I need to remind you BC of the minor details surrounding having not just a child, but another child, a fourth infact! If you will care to amuse yourself with my dilemma for just a moment while I share some facts with you.

Pregnancy is a lottery, and I already have one child who has a disability unique to the world, so no-one knows this better than me. With pregnancy I believe you need to be ready for anything. Do you really expect me to be in the running for another special needs child? Just because I have one doesn’t give me a ticket saying “no more special needs kids for you”! This possibility is of course increased with that 40 something age.

Then there is the body element. Carrying, lifting, bending, crouching, sitting on my knees, sore breasts, stiff neck and leaking bits just to name a few. Try stretching your inner workings to the limit and let me know how you go.

Sometimes when feeling exhausted and climbing into bed, I have found myself imagining in the moment that all of a sudden, I can’t get into bed and won’t be able to for some time yet. There is a little person crying for that night time feed and they won’t wait. Every time I think of this it reminds me of how much I am enjoying my sleep through the night bliss.

I recall interrupted showers where I am lucky to get my hair both shampooed and conditioned. When my hair was lucky to see a brush, and was casually tied up to hide the knots. Where I was lucky to finish a meal without having to get up, or grabbing anything from the kitchen cupboard just to not feel hungry.

If you have read my article on How you Know Kids have Ruined your Sex Life, it would be no secret to you on how a baby changed our bedroom dynamics. I am sure I am in the majority with this one. Either that or my friends are nodding then secretly chuckling behind my back. Speaking of friends, I think I lost some along the way as I kept putting off catchups, and where my best friend became a little clip that kept me from continuously picking the dummy up off the floor. How I loved that clip.

Back to nappies? I just got rid of them! I was the poo expert. No one knew more about poo than me and I was proud of it. I have now found other areas of expertise that I enjoy… and they have no smell!

As if I don’t have enough washing. Do you know how many outfits babies go through in one day? Ah yes, then there is the keep the floor perfectly clean for a crawling baby. Impossible no matter how hard you try!

A baby in the house would not be appreciated by potential siblings due to a few changes that would have to be made. Firstly, someone would have to give up having their own room, closely followed by Lego now be banished to the upstairs, and play would now consist of many shushes and unappreciated loud noise faces.

Many hours of waiting would now take place to wait for baby to wake, go to sleep, be fed. The list of waiting times goes on really. Another baby also means less time for my existing children. I struggle with time as it is, and at the end of the day find myself asking if I have spent enough time with the kids I have, let alone another.

So forgive me Biological Clock if I seem to be ignoring you. I am doing my best!

I must say though that my greatest fear is that in years to come I will be sorry that I did not listen. That the ticking will get louder and louder, but with no time for me to do anything about it. Will I be looking at the empty chair at the dining room table and wishing I had of listened, or will you silence and allow me to feel truly content?

If you give in to your biological clock in your 40’s, my well wishes go with you. All babies are a gift, I know, I have three of them.

By Danielle Mantakoul
Copyright 2013
www.mummyweekly.com.au

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